The thing forest forgot to add to that saying is......
Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your going to get....
You could get all the crap ass flavor filled ones that no one wants...you know the ones where you take one bite, go yuck, and out it back!
You could get diabetes, cavities, or fat!
You may be say, Jesus, Loren why the dooms day attitude on such a wonderful day of love as valentines. Well, our lives of chocolate were starting to look up. Kline has been getting more and more breaks and I was 15 weeks pregnant. Our future was looking brighter than it has in over a year.
Until this Monday, we went in for our 15 weeks check up and there was no heart beat. Our little baby was only measuring at 12 weeks so I guess it's heart stopped beating 3 weeks ago. In a flash our box of yummy chocolates turned into shit flavored chocolates.
So, now just when the light was getting brighter, Kline was getting better and my depression and out look on life was getting better, we are thrown for a backwards loop.
Our dnc was Tuesday and Kline is still a little confused about the baby in mommy's belly. Although as you know I can't hide anything and have been Really open and honest with him as to what is happening.
He told me, "don't worry mommy, one day you will have a baby!". And he is right, I already have my baby!!! He was a miracal from day one, after trying for 7 years to get pregnant and doing one round of ivf, Kline came into our life. Well, worth the wait! So, even if I never have another baby, we have him and he is amazing! Brave , strong, compassionate and going to change the world!
So, give your babies and extra hard hug for our little baby In heaven! If you have a baby in heaven too..I am sure our babies are playing together, and I am sorry for your loss! I feel you pain and hope that you have a baby on earth to love like we do.
Xoxo happy valentines day, Loren
Hey Hun, sorry to hear your sad news.
ReplyDeleteI had the same thing happen to me a while ago. I went for my first scan and the baby had died. I thought I had gotten past 13 weeks without a hitch but the baby died at 10 weeks. It was a real shock.
Happily, I went on to have another two successful pregnancies, but the pain of my loss is always there. I feel for you cos I know what a tough year you have had.
Sending you lots of hugs and love from my side of the pond. Keep hugging that sweetie Kline. His gorgeous smile will help you get through this sad time.
Love and hugs. Xoxoxoxox
::::hugs::::
ReplyDeleteI just came across your blog from GAPS FB page....am truly sorry for your loss. There are no words to offer to make it heal faster....my prayers are with you! Just so you know, you have lifted my soul today! I cannot thank you enough for your blog (which I plan to read all the way through tonight)...I have had severe eczema since 6 months old. I am now 40 and I can tell you that the steroids finally did me in about 10 years ago with my first pregnancy...I ended up with liver damage and by my 3rd I had to sadly have my tubes tied because even though I wanted a lot of children, my body was in such failure I was at risk of dying with another pregnancy. I am now starting GAPS and praying it cures this once and for all. Thank you again as I truly needed some encouragement and hope tonight. And I will pray the Lord brings you a new baby soon and your heart heals soon over your loss.
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