I must first say that Kline doesn't say itch me......he says "eat me!". Which make this story even more disturbingly funny! He also calls his penis , peenee.


Last night at the dinner table Kline pulled down his pants and said, "eat my peenee, daddy!".... we couldn't help to laugh, right?! But then he started to cry and after a few minutes he could tell daddy was in fact not going to " eat his pee nee!" , at least nit at the dinner table! Kline knew if he cried enough he may have a good change that pushover mommy may. So, there at the dinner table, I "eat" my son's pee nee! What the ........? Thank god we didn't have friends over or that we were out at a 5 star restaurant or at a 1 star restaurant for that matter! The things you do for your itchy eczema baby!!

Kline is very one with his package! In November he had to get an emergency circumcision because his skin is so sensitive his little pee nee holes developed scar tissue and was closing up on him, lots of tests and $3,000 dollars later, he has a "new pee nee". Which he will show to anyone, "see my new pee née!".(oh, it sounds so French when my iPad changes peenee to pee née ) Thank god we don't go to church, could you imagine in the middle of mass......" eat my pee nee, mom, now!!!!!" or " hi father, your holiness, See my new pee nee!".

At night , in the dark, my itching skills are really challenged. He will say "eat me here!". And well, "I can't see Kline!!!!! Where is here, use your words!" So he'll say" my ankle" I'll itch his ankle, and he'll start yelling at me "no, here!!" oh ok son, I didn't realize that when you said ankle you mean the one on your shoulder!!! What was I thinking? This goes on all night, he gets frustrated at me because I am not " eating him "where he wants to be eaten and I get frustrated at him because he is yelling at Me at 4am in the morning!

Kline doesn't just like us to "eat him", there are different types of eating that he insists on.....

There's the regular "eating"
And scratching, which I have taken as " eat me harder!"
there is the petting, "pet me,mommy!"
then the rub.
And Don't forget the tickle
And finally, there is the over stimulate, " don't touch me!"

This goes on most of the night, if not all night and most of the day! I can't wait to see if this gaps diet will make our nights less crazy with, rubbing and eating!?!? I hope to never " eat my sons pee nee" at the dinner table again! That is just wrong!!!!! Xoxoxoxoox Loren